Life After Maternity Leave

Hello everyone, 

I hope that you are all enjoying this wintery time of year, and that you are able to find a spot in your day to snuggle up in your favorite chair, with a cup of tea whilst Bubs naps, and take some time to reflect on the year that has whizzed by and the one that is about to come along. In today’s blog, I wanted to spend some time with you to reflect on the first year of being a new parent, and mention  some practical tips so that you can embrace the next stages we are going to go through; Life After Maternity Leave.

As a new year comes towards us, it is tempting to fall into the familiar traditions of reflecting on all we need to change, sort out, reorganise… improve. Lists are made, new journals are started (Bridget Jones; you have nothing on me and my stack of new journals!) and we can be in danger or stepping into a rather forced shedding of all that has been before. 

Reflecting On What Has Been.

Your maternity leave has been a precious time, filled with ups, downs and sideways! Many women come to the end of the year feeling that they have been on a hormonal rollercoaster; some have had to have surgery to repair their tears, physio sessions have been made priorities, and Pilates classes have been attended so that those core muscles can start to feel again! New friends have been made, others have fallen away, new family traditions have started, and above all, you have seen the love of your life grow from a tiny new-born to a one year old with opinions and attitudes. (Just wait until the wonderful teenage years!) 

Reflecting on all of this, honouring your journey, and spending time looking at what you can take from it and start to enjoy in the next part of your exciting life is the first step of going back to work. There is joy in stepping into the next ‘phase’, and this transition is one that you will feel yourself doing a lot from now on. From baby to toddler, to the first day of school, their first crush (then heartbreak), choosing college, when they pass their driving tests, as they move away from home… it is all part of the same process that you are feeling now; that is change. 

How Your Doula Can Help

I advocate a lot with my clients for some ‘Reflection Time’, and I make sure that there are scheduled times in our work together where Mum can take herself away with a hot cup of tea to spend time on her own, with a journal or notepad, knowing that bubs is held and safe. My affirmation cards were partly inspired by these times, and when clients are feeling stuck in their reflection times, these can help to unlock the feelings they hold. 

Going Back When You Are Moving Forward.

We talk about the really early days after Mumma has given birth, the care she so desperately needs to find her feet again, about the tricky transition of weaning, and all the bits in between, however there is often a stage that we skate over, and that is the end of maternity leave for the majority of women in the UK. 

Going back to work is a tricky stage to face, due to the fact that our identities and role in life has changed exponentially since the last time you were last with your work colleagues. Your outlook on life will have naturally shifted, your priorities will have naturally changed, and working relationships will have new dynamics. Perhaps more importantly, your identity will be seen a little differently by the people you work with, and you will feel differently about it too! All these things are true, but looking at them and processing them can take time. 

How your doula can help…

‘Game Planning’ is the name of the game! Part of our role as your post-natal doula is giving you the time and space to talk about all these concerns and fears in a non-judgemental space. Chatting over a banana muffin can be the best time of the day to help you process what you are going through. Your doula can offer you room to find your own way of navigating this stretch of change and help empower you to structure the way that you would like to return to work, by embracing your own needs as well as the needs of your company or line of work. 

Book Your Sessions With Me!

Looking Through The Fog

Brain Fog is a real thing, and the idea of thinking coherently in a business meeting can be daunting at best. There is a lot that can help with brain fog, and talking to your doctor to ask for a hormone test can be a very practical step if you are feeling as if you are suffering more that you think is normal after birth, especially if it is still as foggy as it was in the beginning days of the year. 

However, sometimes we also need to look at the basics to help clear the clouds away. Making sure you have nutritious meals filled with powerful antioxidants and balanced foods that will help you function at your best are the best ways to make sure you are not sugar crashing. Snacks that are healthy help with those between-meal peckish moments, and also making sure you are getting outside and moving once a day is a must. 

How Your Doula Can Help

I have had such an amazing year learning through Roots And Remedies! There are incredibly powerful, natural supplements that can form part of your power pack through this time and we can talk together to see if we can find a natural way of boosting you through the fog. I also spend a lot of time cooking at home for my clients, filling their freezers with nutritious meals and their snack jars with healthy options. 

Looking Good And Feeling Great!

Looking at the wardrobe and realising that none of the old clothes that you used to wear to work feel great (and most are now the wrong size anyway), can be a daunting process. Getting your wardrobe sorted out before you go back to work can be a struggle, and I would always suggest carving out just 15 minutes a day two months before you go back to work to look through a drawer or two and start sifting through your clothes. 

Writing a list of clothes that you feel you need as you go will help stop you from panic buying! Underwear is a great section of the wardrobe to replace; honestly, those baggy knickers that felt so good in the first couple of months under sweatpants that kept you feeling comforted are not going to make you feel empowered in the workplace! Tights, and socks also need to be gone through as these are often overlooked in the ‘starting again’ phase. 

Once you have your list, ask a girlfriend or sister if they would like to go for a shopping trip. It’s a little retro to spend a day together trying on clothes at the shops, but it can be a great place to chat with someone about all-the-things, as well as get their advice on fashion and colours. A day out of planned shopping can be the best kind of therapy out there. 

How Your Doula Can Help

For this process, we are here to help in whatever way you need us! From holding Bubs as you take time to go through the wardrobe, to helping you organise the process, we can help you get to the place you feel you need to be by simply holding the space and being entirely practical about the whole process. Continuity of care at its best, and also a gentle way of leaving your baby for a little time, with someone trusted, can feel like another step in this transition. 

Book Your Sessions With Me!

I hope that these very practical ideas have helped you to start seeing the wood for the trees as you start to think about going back to work. As a post-natal doula, I am here for the first full year after your birth and am happy to help. But remember…

Once your doula, always your doula!

Love, Sam xx